Tuesday, November 22, 2011
It’s that time of year again: toy catalogs arrive in the mail every day, turkeys are running for their lives, the smells of pumpkin and cinnamon permeate the air and parents are snapping pictures of their little ones for holiday cards.
Along with those pretty pics, families often write letters with news (bragging about their kids) from the year past.
December is a busy month: Christmas pageants, school parties, tree trimming, our oldest son’s birthday sending cards gets lost in the shuffle.
So, for the second year now, I opted to be non-traditional and send Thanksgiving cards instead. And for the first time, I decided to include a letter, but not a “typical” one.
Does anyone really want to read about how fabulous our rugrats … er, children are? (Truly they are fabulous, but I’m a little biased).
I read through the Motherhood columns from this year and selected my 10 favorite - comical, rather - moments of the year to share with our loved ones (and all of you).
Here are no.’s 10-6:
“After a Clark Griswold-like tantrum, my husband, sprinted back to the rental desk to inform them that not even our luggage - let alone a family of five - would fit in the tiny Fiat ‘van’ on donut tires.” - Although this was actually in December, it made headlines in January. We spent last Christmas abroad, in Austria, with the husband’s family. The celebration was great; the vehicle, not so much.
(Valentine’s Day): “Naturally, while snatching a blob of chicken from the baby’s grasp, a cup of juice was spilled on the table, leaving us to soak up the mess with paper towels while trying to avoid catching them on fire in the fondue flame.” - Consider this a Public Service Announcement: fondue + children = bad idea
“I have never worn safety glasses while trimming my kids’ toenails, but today would have been a good day to start.” - Do you really want to know?
“My body demands oxygen after the physical challenge of changing her diaper. She insists on feeding herself, which would be great if she could hit her mouth. She has sucked back a travel-size tube of toothpaste requiring a call to poison control; managed to get a “childproof cap” off of a bottle of dish soap I mistakenly put within reach and escaped from her stroller - restraints and all - at the baseball park.” - Princess reaches the Terrible-Twos a few months early.
“I was more interested in what the medal was for: hula hoop toss? egg-in-a-spoon race? The suspense was killing me. When my son shoved the medal in my face I gasped again: first place ‘A writing contest’, he said. ‘I won!’” - A little “traditional” here: Our oldest son won first place in the entire first grade with his written and illustrated story “Super Hamster.” So proud of him!
Happy Thanksgiving! And thanks to all of you for reading Motherhood. (Next week: the Top Five)
Contact this contributing writer at Motherhoodcolumn@yahoo.com or facebook.com/MotherhoodCTC.Tweet